Meredith: why can’t this be us
always
complete with background music wherever we go
and wearing mumus instead of clothes
and looking fug with our breast implants and not caring
Melanie: oh my god
i want it
i’m cuter than her
i want that
let’s be a biracial reality show
let’s make that hapen
*happen
Meredith: CAN we?!
can WE take miami?
Melanie: who do i need to fuck to make that happen
i am not below that
So, how’d my first day back in the 9-5’er (uh, well, sort of…I start at 10…) world go? Well, I arrived at the office about 10 minutes early, and instead of going in, I waited outside across the street for eight minutes until 9:58. This would make the first hour not drag out so long, I reasoned. This is called: false.
By 11 o’clock I had to sing Cyndi Lauper songs in my head to keep myself from falling asleep.
At noon, I wanted to chainsmoke a pack of Marlboro Reds so bad, I didn’t even care that I don’t even really smoke.
Around 2 o’clock I became homicidal.
And at 3 o’clock I hid in the bathroom for ten minutes to resist the urge to throw myself out the window.
But then, I listened to the following Kings of Leon song on the walk home.
Through the throngs of harried women in sweaty work dresses, and corpulent businessmen in wrinkled suits, my ipod offered me salvation from the soul crushing corporate world at last.
Okay. Fine, I’m working for a non-profit — not a big corporation. And, this was only day one. I have got to stop being a baby. I mean, if Brett Favre can pull himself out of retirement (twice!) from his out of shape boot straps, the least I can do is go join the rest of society and work in an office. I mean, hello, Meredith, that’s what you were doing before the ol’ resesh came a-knockin’ on your door…Two months out of the game is a long time though… Maybe I should just drop out of soceity, and abandon the idea of an office job all together. I’ll become a Neo-Beat poet and change my name to Juniper Breeze, Satchel Fig-Tree, or Brett Michaels. Yeah, that sounds nice. Good talk.
Looks like I’ll be temping for the OBG’s (Oldies But Goodies) again, starting at the end of this week. Cue: the pyrotechnics, dancing girls, the music —
and what not.
Don’t worry, it’s almost the WEEKEND!
Which means, it’s almost time to do this:
melsanie
thedith
A Blog of Two Cities 