Tweens, Teens, and Fashionable Zeal: 90’s Edition

There I was, it was a typical night, I was lying in bed watching episodes of Full House on Youtube, when the thought struck me — how do I dress with as much style as Stephanie Tanner? Answer: You don’t.  But this got me thinking; if we’re going to bring the 90’s back, which, I think we’ve all accepted in this new decade to do,  where do we draw our nostalgic influence from? Answer: 90’s tween/teen stars.  Follow me!

Wait, What Decade are We Supposed to be Nostalgic for Again?

Because like, two weeks ago, it was the 90s, right?  Seriously, last month we were all wearing plaid and some derivative of Doc Marten boots.

Doc Martens: I would be lying to you if I said I don't actually kind of want a pair

Adventures in Theme Songs

Okay, I wasn’t going to whip it out so soon, but I figured eh, why not? This is actually my favorite theme song of all time.  That’s right, I admit it.  And you know what? Maybe (okay, is) it’s actually my all-time favorite childhood show of all time.  Hey, that’s right. Deal with it. You can’t take that away from me.  So what, I had a talking Michelle doll?

My younger sister once asked me if I moved to San Francisco just because of Full House.  The answer is mostly no…

One Part of the 90s I Want to Relive

Dave Matthews Band. Man, did I love them.  My camp counselor introduced me to them in fifth grade and my life was never the same (My life might have also changed due to the fact that my bunk did a song and dance number to “Total Eclipse of the Heart” in front of the whole camp, but that’s another story.)  I loved all his albums from then on–I actually didn’t like Crash at first, but eventually grew to like it.  However, after the Lillywhite Sessions album, by fandom decreased.  I couldn’t even get into Everyday.  Sure, they had a few good songs here and there, but nothing like the 90’s era hits.  I don’t want to go to a concert now because I don’t want to hear the new stuff, just the oldies but goodies.  Those concerts were epic.  The tailgating, the cloud of smoke above Alpine Valley, insane amounts of hemp and tie-dye.  Man, those were great.  Concerts now though are filled with the grown up versions of hippies and are far less fun.  If I could time travel back to the 90’s, I would do three things:  rock out on my Skip-It, tell myself to never wear the hat that looks like a condom and go to a Dave concert.

Favorite songs:

• #41
• Two Step
• Crash Into Me (Live from Folsom Field version)
• Lover Lay Down
• The Stone
• Grace is Gone
• Warehouse
• Crush
• Say Goodbye
• Big Eyed Fish
• Grey Street
• Ants Marching (only the live versions

Explanation Nation

Clarissa Explains it All was the highlight of my childhood.  Not only did Clarissa have killer style, but she had the best friend, Sam, who for some reason was incapable of using the front door.  Hortense, over at Jezebel, did a good recap as to why Clarissa was better than Blossom, so I’ll let her do the talking.  In the meantime, here is the best opening credits of all time.  I may or may not have practiced writing ‘Melanie’ backwards in my shower.

Childhood Idols Found

Here are some answers to the questions Mer asked earlier in addition to some other 90 teen idols we all loved and adored.

Jenna von Oy: most recently on The Parkers as the token white girl.  If you google image search for her you’ll get some pretty scandalous pictures.  She is allegedly good friends with Melissa Joan Heart too.

Melissa Joan Heart: She looks exactly the same as she does from Clarissa Explains it All.  And, even though she was most recently in a horrible made for TV romcom with Joey Lawrence, I will forever remember her as the crazy year book girl from the best 90’s movie ever Can’t Hardly Wait.

Larisa Oleynik:  After graduating from Sarah Lawrence in 2004, she’s been pretty under the radar, showing up in shows that typically lead up to getting back in the “acting” scene aka supporting friend to A-List actor in a romcom.

Marla Sokoloff: 90’s queen.  She made appearances in all awesome 90’s shows:  Full House, Party of Five, Babysitters Club, 3rd Rock From the Sun, Home Improvement and more.  In the new millenium, she broke up with James Franco and is a supporting bff in Lifetime’s mini-series Maneater.  I may or may not be watching it now and it may or may not be horribly awesome.

In My Opinionation

Miyim Bialik, aka Blossom, is going to be on What Not To Wear. This is awesome, yet sadly, unsurprising news.  Who amongst us can forget Blossom’s penchant for pleated shorts and giant flower hats? Not this blogger, that’s for sure.

I wonder what Blossom’s totally radder, best friend Six would have to say?

Blossom, Six, and Joey in happier (yet tackier) times

Is she even still alive?  Huh.  That can be a fun activity if you’re truly bored: Find out whatever happened to Jenna Von Oy and report back to me.  While you’re at it, find The Secret World of Alex Mack‘s Larissa Oylenik for me too?

Have you seen this girl?

She’s not related to anything in this post, but, like seriously, what happened to her?

The Blossom theme song. Why? Because it’s awesome.