Meredith: is it me, or are these shoes kind of awesome
Melanie: not me
melanie: i may or may not be watching Jonas right now
andrea: i am judging you
andrea: judging you so hard i hope you can feel it
Love,
melsanie
1:19 PM
Meredith: why do i suddenly have the urge to bone rod stewart?
Meredith: last week, not only did a teenager with aspergers ask for my number but i was asked by my co-worker why i don’t have a boyfriend
Nikki: hahaha
Meredith: then a teenager proposed to me while his friends took pictures for a scavenger hunt
like, really? must i have all these things happen in one weekend? such an accidental coug
Nikki: ugh i hate those “why aren’t you dating anyone” questions
Meredith: i know! so obnoxious
Nikki: like what do you say to that?
hmm well i’m not dating anyone because i don’t like anyone
and no one likes me
yay. the end.
Meredith: i want to respond with “why are you such a nosy shit?”
or, “i’m a lesbian”
Jeffrey: hahah, well if my monotonous schedule is any indication
i’d say your sitch sounds more interesting
i’ve taken to taking myself on daily field trips to different floors to steal coffee and muffins from outside different conference rooms
woo take your shirt off
meredith (4:38): okay please tell me what this smily face is
meredith(4:45): and then, i realized oh no. i’m like thisclose to taping cathy comics on a cubicle
meredith(5:33): if you could see me now, i am putting pens up my nose. just so you know
Image by Nataliedee
Meredith: and, although i hate this song:
i do really like this performance i’m so conflicted!
Melanie: i hate that you have shown me this song more than three times
Meredith: HAHAHAHA
Melanie: because i hate this song so much
Meredith: i know that i’ve shown it to you at least once before
Melanie: well once felt like three times because it’s that bad
Meredith: but i needed to drive home the point that the performance is so good but this song is so bad
Melanie: i can’t even watch
Meredith: like, i want to take this song in my bare hands and strangle it
Melanie: and kick it in the balls
11:00 AM what are those dancers doing
Meredith: then take a shit on its face
Melanie: and then sleep with it’s mother for good measure
Meredith: and best friend
11:01 AM
Melanie: what are those dancers doing? there is too much shimmying for this song
Meredith: and why are there like TEN synthasizers?
i like the one guy playing 2 at once
Melanie: i don’t even think one is being played
is that a keyboard guitar?
keytar?
Meredith: YES
where do we get a keytar?
Melanie: i want a keyar and play it with my piano tie
Meredith: hahahahaha
omg there are no words for how angry i get when that song comes on the radio
it’s like that movie that was controversial back in the 50s or something, because whenever “jailhouse rock” would come on, the youth would riot that’s what “break my stride” is like everytime i hear that song i want to riot and break shit
Melanie: i will join you in that rebellion
Meredith: i picture them calling in building security picking you up, and you kicking your legs as they carry you out of the building
Melanie: and i’ll be convulsing foaming at the mouth allll because of that song
Meredith: “ain’t nothin’ gonna break my stride, ain’t nothin’ gonna hold me do-wn, oh nooo!”
ugh that song ruined my morning not even “let’s stay together” can save it
Melanie: oh shut up
shut up
i’m going to listen to jordin sparks* to try to erase that other horse poop from my memory
*This song is good enough to be posted twice within a week.
Meredith: why can’t this be us
always
complete with background music wherever we go
and wearing mumus instead of clothes
and looking fug with our breast implants and not caring
Melanie: oh my god
i want it
i’m cuter than her
i want that
let’s be a biracial reality show
let’s make that hapen
*happen
Meredith: CAN we?!
can WE take miami?
Melanie: who do i need to fuck to make that happen
i am not below that
melsanie
thedith
A Blog of Two Cities 