Dear East Coast, Do You Realize How Lucky You Are?

Dear East Coast,

Do you realize how lucky you are? You’ve got proper bagels, perfect pizza, and, my favorite, Yuengling beer.  DO YOU REALIZE HOW LUCKY YOU ARE? Sure your weather’s shit; this winter you guys have a bizarre fondness for fur hats, and you’ve got kind of gnarly accents, but c’mon,you guys have Yuengling.  Yuengling! The world’s best cheap beer that actually tastes delicious instead of watery or like barf (Bud Lite and PBR, I’m lookin’ at you…).  Yuengling, baby, you da fuckin’ best.  Tha motherfuckin’ best.